Thursday, March 03, 2005
Amira will be a year old in seven days. I cannot believe that a year has past already. It makes me sad a little bit that it has flown by so quickly. She has six teeth, she stands up on the furniture and cruises around. She says all sorts of words (but not mama) like Baba (for Rich), up, tickle, piggy, car, ball, jet (she even makes jet sounds and zooms toys in her hands), yeah (but not yes), love you, she has said Elijah once, and even said Larry Boy while reaching for the Larry-mobile. She claps, makes kisses, nods and shakes her head, but doesn't wave bye-bye.
Our boys all said Mama first. They also didn't really like Rich all that much, Dominic was openly hostile toward him until he was about two years old. Then he went into toleration, he adores his Baba now, but it took some time. Rich says it's nice to have a baby who loves him. Now, I get to feel a little of what Rich felt with the boys. She doesn't dislike me, but she prefers Rich, and now that she's weaned, she figures he's just as good as I am and she is his girl. She only says love you to me, and she only makes kisses to me, but she wants her Baba when she is hurt or sad, and she says Baba all the time and has only recently started saying anything that resembles Mama.
I'm trying not to be too wrapped up in this, after all, even Dominic adores Rich now, and Rich got his turn to be the boys' favorite, and I want him to have a close relationship with Amira. I just want one, too. I have to admit I'm a little envious that she has a father who is around and dedicated and loves her so much, he is the kind of father I wish I had had. So, I'm thrilled that she has a father like Rich, and maybe part of this is just that I don't know what it looks like to have a father-daughter relationship, or really a father-anyone relationship, as a child. There is something special about the bond between mother and son, and I imagine it is also true with fathers and daughters, I just never got to experience it. I take comfort in the fact that Alexander, who was our most independent child, even as an infant, and made me feel like he somehow wasn't attached to me, is now my best helper and closest son.
Anyway, we're not planning on doing a big birthday bash for her on her birthday, both because she wouldn't know and because it is Lent. So, on the following Sunday, I am going to bring a big fancy layered carrot cake with candied carrot ribbons tying it up as decoration and share it with the church so we can celebrate together and then a family party at home.